According to a survey, only 14% of couples sleep in separate beds every night. And while many of us might believe in the saying “couples who sleep apart grow apart” there are studies that show the opposite is actually true.
We at Bright Side believe that there are no wrong or right sleep arrangements, because to some, sleeping in different beds can be as pleasing as for others sharing a bed with their partner.
A poor night’s sleep can turn lovers into fighters.
According to research, sharing a bed with a partner that has restless sleep behavior can deprive you of 49 minutes of sleep each night. And, when one partner doesn’t get a proper night’s sleep because of the other, it will most likely result in a conflict between them the next day.
Actually, the study even confirmed that couples who tend to have a poor night’s sleep have more severe and more frequent fights than those who wake up well-rested. People who get a good night’s sleep, on the other hand, are more likely to be in a good mood, have lower stress levels, and be more patient.
Resenting your partner because you can’t get a good night’s sleep can be destructive to the relationship.
Snoring, fidgeting, and bed or blanket hogging are just a few of many reasons why some couples choose to sleep in different beds or even in different bedrooms. Lying awake listening to your partner snoring while you beat yourself up to fall asleep can lead to a build-up of anger, tension, and resentment toward your partner.
According to Jennifer Adams, author of Sleeping Apart Not Falling Apart, sleeping in a separate bedroom can even help a relationship thrive because both partners are not sleep deprived.
Each partner can tailor their sleeping conditions to their heart’s content.
Tina Cooper, a licensed social worker, sleeps in different bedrooms with her partner because of their opposite sleeping habits. “I’m a night owl, he’s an early bird. I need soothing sounds to fall asleep, and he likes silence. He likes a hard mattress, and I like soft and full of pillows. And because I don’t like the early day’s sunlight, my boyfriend gave me the master bedroom which gets less light and he has the second largest room that gets the sunrise he loves.”
How you spend the nighttime in your shared bedroom with your partner can also influence your daytime functioning, marital satisfaction, and psychological and physical health. And when 2 people with different bedtime preferences and nighttime schedules end up together, changing themselves just to please their partner’s needs might harm their relationship in the long run.
Sleeping in different bedrooms with your partner means that the 2 of you will have a place just for yourselves where you can relax after an exhausting day. This way, both of you can satisfy your needs without tiptoeing around and worrying about whether your partner might wake up because you want to watch the latest episode of your show before bed.
Even if you don’t remember waking up, disturbed sleep can have a negative impact on your overall health.
During the night, our brain cycles through the stages of sleep several times: light sleep, deep sleep, and REM (Rapid eye movement sleep). But when you interrupt the cycle by waking up during the night, it means that your brain spends more time in the light sleep stage and misses out on REM. And without sufficient REM your emotional well-being and cognitive performance suffer.
Interrupted sleep can also have short and long-term health consequences, like hypertension, weight-related issues, mental health problems, reduced quality of life, and other health-related issues.
People on Reddit share why they decided to sleep separately with their partner.
- “Because a good night’s sleep is more romantic than sharing a bed. I snore and toss and turn. He gives off literal village levels of heat in his sleep and I can’t stand the heat. I read, he can’t stand light. We keep different hours to an extent. A million reasons. We get along so much better this way.” — crankyweasels
- “My partner and I have completely separate bedrooms. We ’sleepover’ occasionally in each other’s rooms. However, we both sleep exponentially better apart. He’s a night owl and I’m an early bird. He wants only one sheet on him, I want 10 lbs of blankets. In addition, having a separate room allows me to decorate it however I want, have my own personal space, and keep it to the level of cleanliness I prefer. People look at us sideways when I mention the separate rooms thing, but it’s been a game-changer.” — eriasana
- “Different sleep cycles due to different work schedules. We are still madly in love and we both agreed to this because it’s the best for both of us.” — AFishInATank
- “Early in our relationship, 90% of our fights occurred in the bedroom. I like to sleep in a cold room with the fan on and white noise like a box fan. I also like to go to sleep with the TV on. She likes to sleep in a warm, still, cave in complete silence and darkness. We started sleeping in separate rooms and all of a sudden 90% of our fights stopped. Also, because we were getting real sleep, other fights turned more into heated discussions.” — ttc8420
What are your sleeping arrangements with your partner? Do you believe sleeping in different beds can help a relationship thrive?
Legendary Actor Dustin Hoffman’s Secret Battle with Cancer and Triumphant Journey to Recovery
The gifted actor Dustin Hoffman, well known for his part in Rain Man, battled and overcame cancer in a low-key manner in 2013. Even after winning, he made the decision to keep his recovery from illness a secret, hardly ever sharing it with anyone. Following a successful course of cancer treatment, Hoffman was “feeling great and in good health,” according to his publicist, Jodi Gottlieb. Through early detection and surgery, the cancer was completely healed.
Hoffman initially gained notoriety in 1967 for his breakthrough performance in the romantic comedy The Graduate, for which he was nominated for his first Academy Award. He made a lasting impression on the film industry and rose to fame at the age of thirty. Hoffman gave outstanding performances in films such as the moving drama Kramer vs. Kramer (1979) and the 1976 film All the President’s Men.
Hoffman portrayed a guy in Tootsie who passed for a woman in order to land a part in a soap opera, making it one of his most iconic roles. Hoffman said that the event had a significant influence on his view of women.
Hoffman was shocked to learn that he wasn’t considered conventionally attractive as a woman. He came to see how women’s appearance was unduly constrained by society expectations. This insight permanently altered his behavior toward women, both in real life and on screen.
Even though Tootsie was a huge hit, Hoffman saw beyond its comedic merits. Soaring to become the second highest-grossing movie of the year, the picture delved into more significant subjects and struck a strong chord with viewers.
Hoffman won his first Oscar for Kramer vs. Kramer in 1988 before taking home his second Oscar for his outstanding performance in Rain Man. Six Golden Globe Awards and one Primetime Emmy were given to him in recognition of his talent. Hoffman was in great demand in the market and his career was booming.
But in 2013, he abruptly disappeared from the spotlight, leaving his followers to wonder where he had gone. They had no idea that Hoffman was secretly fighting cancer.
The reason for his seclusion wasn’t made public until a few months after he directed the British comedy Quartet in 2012 and finished filming Chef in 2014, in which he co-starred with Jon Favreau and Sofia Vergara. Hoffman had received cancer treatment, but his representative revealed that he had opted to keep the information private. Hoffman was in good condition and had completely recovered from the illness, Jodi Gottlieb informed the public.
Hoffman suffered from health issues, yet he never let that stop him. He has starred in many films since receiving the cancer diagnosis, such as Sam and Kate in 2022 and the impending science fiction drama Metropolopolis in 2024. Furthermore, from 2008 and 2024, he provided the voice of the adored Master Shifu in two additional Kung Fu Panda franchise films.
Hoffman and his spouse were recently sighted walking through the streets of London, as content and in love as ever. The 86-year-old Hollywood icon looked young and carefree while he engaged with cameras and browsed boutiques with his 43-year-old wife.
The path taken by Dustin Hoffman is evidence of his tenacity and unwavering love for what he does. Many people find inspiration in his fight against illness, which serves as a reminder that despite obstacles, it is still possible to triumph and go after our goals.
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