This time, we sent an air fryer to our youngest granddaughter, the cheapest thing on her registry. Eloise called us, livid, accusing us of being cheap. I remember picking up her call and she didn’t even say hi, she just started ranting, “Seriously, Grandma? I just got your gift. An air fryer? That’s the cheapest thing you could find on my registry!”
I was taken aback because as much as the air fryer was the cheapest on their registry, I still thought it’d be useful to them, so I told her that. Eloise kept on complaining, “Useful? Come on, you know you can do better than that. Everyone knows you have the money. I just can’t believe you’d be this cheap with me. It’s embarrassing.”
In this heated moment, I told her, “Yes, you’re right. We are cheap, old, and useless. The only thing you DIDN’T know is that the day before the wedding, we were going to gift you a check for $40,000.”
I revealed this in an attempt to explain to Eloise about the cash gift we usually give our grandkids before the wedding but she was so angry at this point, that she wasn’t listening to a thing I said. I speculated that maybe she didn’t believe we would gift her such an amount of money after only buying her an air fryer.
Eventually, she said, “No, it’s clear. You just don’t love me enough to show it. You know how much pressure I’m under with the wedding. And then, this? It’s like you don’t even care,” then she hung up.
Despite my husband and I’s shock at Eloise’s reaction, we then bought her a China set, hoping to appease her, but decided against giving her the $40,000, feeling she hadn’t earned it.
Fast forward to last week. Eloise talked to her brother and found out that we were telling her the truth about the money. After confirming it with her cousins, she, called again, accusing us of discrimination, “I just found out that it’s true you gave the money to everyone else when they got married. Why didn’t I get anything?”
We stood firm, explaining our stance was due to her initial reaction, “We felt after your reaction to the wedding gift, it wasn’t right to go ahead and gift you the money.” Eloise pleaded trying to convince us otherwise, “So, you’re punishing me? Is that it? Because I was upset about an air fryer?”
I was angry that she didn’t even understand what she did wrong. “It wasn’t about the air fryer, Eloise. It was how you spoke to us, the disrespect. That’s not something we expected or can support,” I explained.
Eloise implored us, nearly in tears, “But that’s so unfair! I was stressed, Grandma. Planning a wedding is hard, and I just snapped. I didn’t mean any of it.” I felt like she should have only apologized to us instead of finding excuses to justify her behavior.
However, I told her, “We understand that it’s a stressful time, but actions and words have consequences. We hoped you’d understand the value of family and love over material things.” Full of desperation, Eloise added, “But you don’t understand! Can’t we just forget all this happened? I need that money, Grandma.”
She pleaded, threatened to boycott Christmas, and accused us of cutting her off but we didn’t budge. In the end, I expressed, “We love you very much. This has nothing to do with cutting you off. We just hope you’ll reflect on this and understand why we made our decision.”
Now, Eloise has followed up on her threat and she’s boycotting Christmas. Her mother, who is our daughter-in-law, is siding with her, calling us unreasonable. However, we feel that after all we have done for Eloise, the air fryer gift, shouldn’t have triggered this reaction.
For context, we had already paid for her college, and her parents covered her graduate school and half the wedding. Additionally, she and her husband are financially comfortable and do not desperately need our money.
We’re also not upset with our grandkids for revealing the cash gift since she is among the group of family members who are allowed to know about it. Our reason for sending the air fryer earlier was that we live far away, so we always send our gifts early.
The wedding gift is also separate from the money, which we give with the hope it will be used for something significant, like a home. Now, we feel like the action we took towards Eloise was well deserved and we are not going back on our decisions even if she and her mom threaten to do their worst.
Despite the tumultuous events and Eloise’s refusal to understand our perspective, my husband and I stand by our decision. Love and respect in our family are paramount, and we hoped this situation would be a learning experience for her.
The holidays might be quieter this year with her family’s absence, but our hope is for healing and understanding in the future. Our door and hearts remain open to Eloise, whenever she’s ready to mend fences.
Want more like this? Click here to read about a grandmother who sparked controversy online because she doesn’t bring her grandchildren gifts when she visits.
This woman only ate one piece of bread a day for 5 years – but look at her now
Despite efforts to accept ourselves at any size and more realistic-looking models in advertisements, a large number of people worldwide suffer from eating disorders on a daily basis.
A Derbyshire lady who overcame anorexia has shared her experience in the hopes that it would support others experiencing similar difficulties.
Annie Windley weighed just 29 kg, or slightly more than four and a half stone, at her heaviest. She was in danger of having a heart attack because of her low weight.
The 21-year-old Woolley Moor resident has been battling anorexia for more than five years, during which time she has required extensive care, medical therapy, and multiple hospital stays. Annie, on the other hand, is in great shape and has recovered thanks to her passion of jogging. In October of last year, I ran the Chesterfield Half Marathon.
She said, “I had the happy awareness that the process of rehabilitation is amazing and should be exhilarating, remarkable, and amazing.
I suppose my anorexia will always be a part of me, even though I’ve learned to manage it and get over my obsession with eating. “It is never too late to make a positive change.”
Annie was first diagnosed with an eating disorder in 2012. When her recuperation finally began two years later, she faced numerous challenges, including being sectioned and experiencing uncontrollably rapid weight loss.
In October of 2017, I began battling more fiercely than I had ever done before; she went on, “I can’t say exactly what occurred, but this time, it was just for myself.”
The battle was amazing; every day was filled with agonizing emotions and remarkable bravery. I’m at my heaviest since 2014 after gaining three stone in the last four months.
Annie claims that she gained the realization that a person’s actions, their mannerisms toward others, and their degree of kindness matter more than their physical stature. According to her, these are the things that truly matter in life.
“These are the things that are essential to you and will bring you happiness.” Rather than organizing your entire day around eating or worrying about how to restrict, use that time to focus on something that matters to people.
Be a kind friend and daughter, make jokes, and engage in conversation with them. Exercise is typically believed to enhance mental health, and Annie is no different. Her passion for running gave her something to strive for, helped her heal, and kept her on course.
Her recuperation was aided by her participation in Chesterfield’s yearly half marathon. She ran the kilometers during her training, putting in a great deal of work and determination to complete the difficult course.
I use my morning run as an opportunity to remind myself of how fleeting and important life is. I can live a more flexible, free life now that I’m well.
I’m fortunate to have strong legs and a pounding heart, so I don’t waste time worrying about meals or watching calories. Exercise is a celebration of what your body is capable of, not a way to make up for what you ate.
“Pay attention to your desire to succeed and your excitement for where you want to go.” Annie claimed that all she had ever done was avoid meals like pizza and chocolate because the voices in her head turned them into numbers and percentage signs.
She has thankfully altered her viewpoint and offers guidance to those who have similar views.
There are bad days when you think recovery isn’t for you, feel “fat,” and lack the desire to eat. However, that is the very reason we have to continue.
We have to demonstrate to our disorders our ability to do so. We don’t want to spent our entire lives regretting and feeling sad about the things our anorexia prevented us from accomplishing.
Watch the video below to see her entire story:
Please share your thoughts in the comments below on her amazing adventure!
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