I was stunned when my husband, Jake, handed me a schedule to help me “become a better wife.” But instead of blowing up, I played along. Little did Jake know, I was about to teach him a lesson that would make him rethink his newfound approach to marriage.
I’ve always prided myself on being the level-headed one in our marriage. Jake, bless his heart, could get swept up in things pretty easily, whether it was a new hobby, or some random YouTube video that promised to change his life in three easy steps.
But we were solid until Jake met Steve. Steve was the type of guy who thought being loudly opinionated made him right, the type that talks right over you when you try to correct him.
He was also a perpetually single guy (who could have guessed?), who graciously dispensed relationship advice to all his married colleagues, Jake included. Jake should’ve known better, but my darling husband was positively smitten with Steve’s confidence.
I didn’t think much of it until Jake started making some noxious comments.
“Steve says relationships work best when the wife takes charge of the household,” he’d say. Or “Steve thinks it’s important for women to look good for their husbands, no matter how long they’ve been married.”
I’d roll my eyes and reply with some sarcastic remark, but it was getting under my skin. Jake was changing. He’d arch his eyebrows if I ordered takeout instead of cooking, and sigh when I let the laundry pile up because, God forbid, I had my own full-time job.
And then it happened. One night, he came home with The List.
He sat me down at the kitchen table, unfolded a piece of paper, and slid it across to me.
“I’ve been thinking,” he started, his voice dripping with a condescending tone I hadn’t heard from him before. “You’re a great wife, Lisa. But there’s room for improvement.”
My eyebrows shot up. “Oh really?”
He nodded, oblivious to the danger zone he was entering. “Yeah. Steve helped me realize that our marriage could be even better if you, you know, stepped up a bit.”
I stared at the paper in front of me. It was a schedule… and he’d written “Lisa’s Weekly Routine for Becoming a Better Wife” at the top in bold.
This guy had actually sat down and mapped out my entire week based on what Steve — a single guy with zero relationship experience — thought I should do to “improve” myself as a wife.
I was supposed to wake up at 5 a.m. every day to make Jake a gourmet breakfast. Then I’d hit the gym for an hour to “stay in shape.”
After that? A delightful lineup of chores: cleaning, laundry, ironing. And that was all before I left for work. I was supposed to cook a meal from scratch every evening and make fancy snacks for Jake and his friends when they came over to hang out at our place.
The whole thing was sexist and insulting on so many levels I didn’t even know where to start. I ended up staring at him, wondering if my husband had lost his mind.
“This will be great for you, and us,” he continued, oblivious.
“Steve says it’s important to maintain structure, and I think you could benefit from —”
“I could benefit from what?” I interrupted, my voice dangerously calm. Jake blinked, caught off guard by the interruption, but he recovered quickly.
“Well, you know, from having some guidance and a schedule.”
I wanted to throw that paper in his face and ask him if he’d developed a death wish. Instead, I did something that surprised even me: I smiled.
“You’re right, Jake,” I said sweetly. “I’m so lucky that you made me this schedule. I’ll start tomorrow.”
The relief on his face was instant. I almost felt sorry for him as I got up and stuck the list on the fridge. Almost. He had no idea what was coming.
The next day, I couldn’t help but smirk as I studied the ridiculous schedule again. If Jake thought he could hand me a list of “improvements,” then he was about to find out just how much structure our life could really handle.
I pulled out my laptop, opened up a fresh document, and titled it, “Jake’s Plan for Becoming the Best Husband Ever.” He wanted a perfect wife? Fine. But there was a cost to perfection.
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I began by listing all the things he had suggested for me, starting with the gym membership he was so keen on. It was laughable, really.
“$1,200 for a personal trainer.” I typed, barely containing my giggle.
Next came the food. If Jake wanted to eat like a king, that wasn’t happening on our current grocery budget. Organic, non-GMO, free-range everything? That stuff didn’t come cheap.
“$700 per month for groceries,” I wrote. He’d probably need to chip in for a cooking class too. Those were pricey, but hey, perfection wasn’t free.
I leaned back in my chair, laughing to myself as I imagined Jake’s face when he saw this. But I wasn’t done. Oh no, the pièce de résistance was still to come.
See, there was no way I could juggle all these expectations while holding down my job. If Jake wanted me to dedicate myself full-time to his absurd routine, then he’d have to compensate for the loss of my income.
I pulled up a calculator, estimating the value of my salary. Then, I added it to the list, complete with a little note: “$75,000 per year to replace Lisa’s salary since she will now be your full-time personal assistant, maid, and chef.”
My stomach hurt from laughing at this point.
And just for good measure, I threw in a suggestion about him needing to expand the house. After all, if he was going to have his friends over regularly, they’d need a dedicated space that wouldn’t intrude on my newly organized, impossibly structured life.
“$50,000 to build a separate ‘man cave’ so Jake and his friends don’t disrupt Lisa’s schedule.”
By the time I was done, the list was a masterpiece. A financial and logistical nightmare, sure, but a masterpiece nonetheless. It wasn’t just a counterattack — it was a wake-up call.
I printed it out, set it neatly on the kitchen counter, and waited for Jake to come home. When he finally walked through the door that evening, he was in a good mood.
“Hey, babe,” he called out, dropping his keys on the counter. He spotted the paper almost immediately. “What’s this?”
I kept my face neutral, fighting the urge to laugh as I watched him pick it up. “Oh, it’s just a little list I put together for you,” I said sweetly, “to help you become the best husband ever.”
Jake chuckled, thinking I was playing along with his little game. But as he scanned the first few lines, the grin started to fade. I could see the wheels turning in his head, the slow realization that this wasn’t the lighthearted joke he thought it was.
“Wait… what is all this?” He squinted at the numbers, his eyes widening as he saw the total costs. “$1,200 for a personal trainer? $700 a month for groceries? What the hell, Lisa?”
I leaned against the kitchen island, crossing my arms.
“Well, you want me to wake up at 5 a.m., hit the gym, make gourmet breakfasts, clean the house, cook dinner, and host your friends. I figured we should budget for all of that, don’t you think?”
His face turned pale as he flipped through the pages. “$75,000 a year? You’re quitting your job?!”
I shrugged. “How else am I supposed to follow your plan? I can’t work and be the perfect wife, right?”
He stared at the paper, dumbfounded.
The numbers, the absurdity of his own demands, it all hit him at once. His smugness evaporated, replaced by a dawning realization that he had seriously, seriously messed up.
“I… I didn’t mean…” Jake stammered, looking at me with wide eyes. “Lisa, I didn’t mean for it to be like this. I just thought —”
“You thought what? That I could ‘improve’ myself like some project?” My voice was calm, but the hurt behind it was real. “Jake, marriage isn’t about lists or routines. It’s about respect. And if you ever try to ‘fix’ me like this again, you’ll be paying a hell of a lot more than what’s on that paper.”
Silence hung in the air, thick and uncomfortable. Jake’s face softened, his shoulders slumping as he let out a deep sigh.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I didn’t realize how ridiculous it was. Steve made it sound sensible, but now I see it’s… it’s toxic. Oh God, I’ve been such a fool.”
I nodded, watching him carefully. “Yes, you have. Honestly, have you looked at Steve’s life? What makes you think he has the life experience to give you advice about marriage? Or anything else?”
The look on his face as my words hit home was priceless.
“You’re right. And he could never afford to live like this.” He slapped the list with the back of his hand. “He… he has no idea about the costs involved, or how demeaning this is. Oh, Lisa, I got carried away again, didn’t I?”
“Yes, but we’ll recover. Now, let’s tear that paper up and go back to being equals.”
He smiled weakly, the tension breaking just a little. “Yeah… let’s do that.”
We ripped up the list together, and for the first time in weeks, I felt like we were back on the same team.
Maybe this was what we needed, a reminder that marriage isn’t about one person being “better” than the other. It’s about being better together.
Taylor Swift’s NYC Date Night with Travis Kelce: Fans Outraged Over Shocking Outfit!
Some Swifties are trying to figure out what the details on Taylor Swift’s bag mean. She carried it during a date night in a much-discussed outfit.
On October 12, Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce were seen enjoying a date night at Torrisi restaurant in New York City. They both looked stylish, but Swift’s all-gold outfit attracted a lot of attention.
While Kelce wore a blue T-shirt from Marni and khaki cargo pants, Swift chose an “Ivy Corset” and “Ivy Skirt” from Annie’s Collection by Annie’s Ibiza, which cost around $795 (£590) for both items.
The singer paired her outfit with $1,140 black platform mules from Versace. She also wore gold jewelry, let her hair down, and carried a $1,423 black and gold shoulder bag from designer Roberto Cavalli.
When photos of Swift and Kelce walking hand-in-hand to the restaurant surfaced, many people took to social media to comment on her look.
“Omg someone get her a stylist because this isn’t it,” one person said. Another echoed, “She could use a stylist. Especially with her money.”
Someone else wondered, “I wonder if she owns any nice clothes? Even jeans and a t-shirt?” Another commenter pleaded, “Just get rid of the bangs already, Taylor.”
More critical remarks followed, with users writing comments like, “Her dress sense is horrible… no style at all,” and “Why is she wearing a costume?”
“It’s giving curtain,” one person joked. Meanwhile, a fan on the fence expressed, “I love Taylor but this new style is…” Another person commented, “These outfits are a disaster.”
However, some comments were positive. “Taylor Swift is SO beautiful,” gushed one admirer. Another said, “Taylor and Travis both look so gorgeous. I love them together.”
A fan added, “They look great! Stylish couple.” Another praised, “Love the snake purse,” referring to the gold monogram on Swift’s Cavalli bag.
The bag featured the letter “R” in the center of two intertwined “C’s” made from gold snakes, leading many Swifties to speculate about its meaning.
Fans wondered if the emblem on the bag hinted at Swift possibly announcing “Reputation (Taylor’s Version)” soon.
“Taylor Swift rocking a bag with the letter ‘R’ and snakes? Could it be ‘Reputation’ era vibes coming back?” one fan wrote. Another added, “Taylor never does anything by accident. Is this a new era of Renaissance or just a nod to the fans?”
Fans are excited because Swift often leaves “easter eggs” to hint at her upcoming plans. They noted that she has already released “Taylor’s Version” of her other albums, leaving only “Reputation” and “1989” expected to drop.
Before the comments about her designer bag, fans thought Swift might announce “Reputation (Taylor’s Version)” during her Eras Tour shows in Australia or Japan in February 2024. They thought this because of an easter egg in her music video for “Bejeweled.”
However, instead, she released her latest album, “The Tortured Poets Department.” On August 20, fans expected an announcement on stage, like she did with “1989 (Taylor’s Version)” and “Speak Now (Taylor’s Version).”
That moment passed, and Swift released the music video for “I Can Do It with a Broken Heart.” Still, fans have continued to speculate about “Reputation.”
Currently, some Swifties think the album might be announced on October 18, the day she starts the final leg of her tour.
As fans await the album announcement, Swift is enjoying her time with her footballer boyfriend.
Before their recent outing in New York City, they had dinner on October 11 with Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds.
A few days earlier, on October 7, Swift showed her support for Travis Kelce at Arrowhead Stadium while his team, the Kansas City Chiefs, played against the New Orleans Saints.
According to a source, Kelce and Swift’s relationship is “beautiful,” and they manage to balance their busy lives. “It’s all about work-life balance, and everyone is dealing with different things. They just acknowledge how hard it is to manage relationships and everything else,” the source said.
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