I’m a full-time mom. About a year ago, I left my job to take care of our three-year-old daughter, who is autistic and requires a lot of support. Lately, I’ve noticed that my usually feminist husband has been criticizing me in a group chat.
Transitioning into the role of a stay-at-home mom (SAHM) wasn’t something I had envisioned for myself. I used to thrive in the fast-paced world of marketing, surrounded by campaigns and fueled by brainstorming sessions over coffee. But all that changed a little over a year ago when my husband, Jake, and I made a significant decision. Our daughter, Lily, who is three and autistic, needed more attention than what her daycare could provide. Her needs are complex, requiring constant care and support, and it became clear that one of us had to be with her full-time.
I won’t sugarcoat it — leaving my career behind was one of the toughest decisions I’ve ever made. I miss the freedom of earning my own income and the satisfaction of a job well done. But here I am now, spending my days planning meals, cooking, and baking. I’ve found joy in these tasks, and experimenting in the kitchen has become my new creative outlet.
Our backyard has turned into a small garden oasis under my care, and I take care of most of the household chores. Jake does his fair share too; he’s actively involved in chores and parenting whenever he’s at home. We’ve always considered ourselves equals, rejecting traditional gender roles, or so I thought until last week.
It was a regular Thursday, and I was tidying up Jake’s home office while he was at work. It’s filled with tech gadgets and piles of paperwork, typical for someone in software development. His computer screen caught my eye — it was still on, casting a soft glow in the dim room. He usually left it on by accident, but what I saw next wasn’t accidental at all.
His Twitter feed was open, and I froze when I saw the hashtag #tradwife attached to a tweet. Confusion washed over me as I read the post. It glorified the joys of having a traditional wife who embraces her domestic duties. Attached was a photo of me, taking a batch of cookies out of the oven, looking every bit like a 1950s housewife. My stomach churned as I scrolled through more posts. There I was again, tending to the garden and reading to Lily, our faces thankfully obscured.
This was Jake’s account, and he had been crafting a whole narrative about our life that was far from reality. He portrayed me as a woman who relished her role as a homemaker, willingly sacrificing her career for aprons and storybooks. The truth of our situation — that this arrangement was a necessity for our daughter’s well-being — was nowhere to be seen.
I felt betrayed. Here was the man I’d loved and trusted for over a decade, sharing our life with strangers under a false pretense that felt foreign to me. It wasn’t just the lies about our relationship dynamics that hurt — it was also the realization that he was using these glimpses of our life to bolster some online persona.
I shut the computer down, my hands trembling with a mix of anger and bewilderment. All day, I grappled with my emotions, trying to comprehend why Jake would do this. Was he dissatisfied with our situation? Did he resent my decision to stay home? Or was it something deeper, a shift in how he perceived me now that I wasn’t contributing financially?
The rest of the day passed in a blur. His posts kept replaying in my mind, and eventually, I couldn’t ignore them any longer. I decided to call him and address everything head-on.
“Jake, we need to talk,” I finally said, trying to keep my voice steady.
He answered, sounding concerned. “What’s wrong?”
I took a deep breath, the weight of my discovery weighing heavily on me. “I saw your Twitter today…”
His expression fell, and he let out a long sigh, indicating he knew exactly what this conversation was about to entail. He started to respond, but I interrupted him.
“Calm down,” he said, dismissing it as “just harmless posting.” That was the final straw. I told him I wanted a divorce, called him out for his deceit, and ended the call.
Jake rushed home immediately. We argued, but with Lily’s strict schedule, I couldn’t let the conflict drag on. He pleaded with me to have a proper conversation after putting Lily to bed. Reluctantly, I agreed. That night, he showed me his phone, revealing that he had deleted the Twitter account. But the damage was already done.
A week passed, and my anger hadn’t subsided. This wasn’t a simple misunderstanding. It was a breach of trust. Jake attempted to explain, claiming it started as a joke, but he got carried away with the attention it garnered. But excuses weren’t enough.
Motivated by a mix of hurt and the need for justice, I decided to expose him. I took screenshots of his tweets and shared them on my Facebook page. I wanted our friends and family to know the truth. My post was straightforward: “Your husband belittles you in front of his friends behind your back. Sound familiar?”
The response was immediate. Our relatives were shocked, and the comments poured in. Jake was inundated with messages and calls. He left work early once more to beg for my forgiveness. He knelt, tears in his eyes, pleading that it was all just a “silly game.”
But I couldn’t let it go. The trust that bound us together was broken. It wasn’t just about a few misguided posts; it was about the respect and understanding we were supposed to have for each other. I told him I needed time and space to think and heal. I moved out with Lily to another apartment.
For six months, Jake begged for forgiveness. He sent messages, left voicemails, and made small gestures to show he was sorry. But sorry wasn’t enough. I told him that if he truly wanted to make amends, we needed to start anew. In my eyes, we were strangers now, and he had to court me like he did years ago when we first met.
So, we began again, slowly. We went on dates, starting with coffee and progressing to dinners. We talked a lot — about everything except the past. It was like rediscovering ourselves individually and as a couple. Jake was patient, perhaps realizing this was his last chance to salvage our once-loving relationship.
As I sit here now, reflecting on the past year, I realize how much I’ve changed. This betrayal forced me to reevaluate not only my marriage but also myself and my needs. I’ve learned that forgiveness isn’t just about accepting an apology; it’s about feeling secure and valued again. It’s a gradual process, one that we’re both committed to, step by step.
What would you have done if you were in my shoes? Share your thoughts on Facebook.
Tom Cruise thought about becoming a monk while married to “extremely brilliant” woman before Nicole Kidman
Tom Cruise, one of the most well-known American movie actors, became well-known at a very young age. When he acted in the now-classic film “Top Gun,” the actor was just 24 years old.
Fans might not be aware, though, that Cruise was given a dyslexia diagnosis when he was just seven years old. The actor has also been a longstanding follower of the Church of Scientology, and he attributes their help in helping him overcome his dyslexia.
Mimi Rogers, Cruise’s first wife, introduced him to the faith. Since her father was a member, he introduced Cruise to his faith and extended an invitation to a meeting at the Hollywood Scientology facility.
Cruise is a member of the Hollywood Educational Literacy Project’s board of directors. With the use of this learning tool, adults and children can receive free one-on-one instruction.
Cruise claimed that even with many tutors’ assistance, he had made every effort to comprehend the reading material, but he was unable to retain what he had read.
Cruise wasn’t able to acquire the assistance he need until he discovered L. Ron Hubbard’s Scientology study tools.
The actor greatly appreciates H.E.L.P. technology because it enabled him to overcome his learning problem by placing the object he was studying in front of him. The idea is to “have an airplane in front of you, if at all possible, while you’re studying an airplane.”
The airplane example is appropriate as Cruise has acknowledged to others that he has always wanted to become a pilot. Despite getting to pretend to be a pilot in “Top Gun,” his dyslexia prevented him from pursuing a career in aviation.
Instyle magazine claims that Cruise and Rogers first spoke in an interview with Rolling Stone in 1986. However, the actress was seeing his friend at the time, so she was powerless to stop it.
Nonetheless, Tom claimed that her “extreme brilliance” piqued his interest. Things moved swiftly once they grew close, and they soon started discussing marriage.
It was not an easy effort, nevertheless, to marry one of the most well-known guys in Hollywood; according to Instyle, they hid the wedding by referring to it as “the project.” The project was carried out in 1987. They seemed to have had a lovely, private ceremony.
The actor claimed that Rogers improved him as an actor and that he couldn’t see himself with anyone else. He continued, saying:
“My wife is the most important person in my life. My best friend is her.
According to Andrew Morton’s unofficial biography of Tom Cruise, the actor filed for divorce on December 9, 1989.
But Mimi gave a detailed account of the circumstances behind her marriage’s dissolution in an interview. She acknowledged that it “bothers” her that her age is frequently mentioned in the media. Tom Cruise was six years her junior.
The well-known actress Rogers maintained, though, that their separation had nothing to do with Scientology, celebrity, or Cruise’s jealously.
The actress disclosed that Cruise had given serious thought to becoming a monk, a career choice that would not work with a married life. As a result, their marriage failed.
Although Cruise maintains the privacy of his personal life, Instyle reports that there are speculations circulating that he dated his “Mission Impossible” co-star Hayley Atwell from 2020 to mid-2022 and is currently unmarried.
Regarding Rogers, she wed producer Chris Ciaffa in 2003; the couple is parent to two kids, Charlie and Lucy.
Following their divorce, Cruise and Rogers announced that the actress had quit Scientology. He continues to be an involved member of the church, for his part.
According to some sources, the church of Scientology played a role in the breakup of Cruise’s two marriages—the first to Rogers and the second to Nicole Kidman.
The actor, who still attends his church, feels that Scientology was a major factor in his success and in helping him get over his dyslexia.
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