There’s One Method of Healing Trauma That Prince Harry Uses, and Here’s How to Practice It

Prince Harry recently opened up about his journey with post-traumatic stress disorder following the loss of his mother, Princess Diana. In a candid discussion, he revealed his exploration of a groundbreaking therapy that helped him.

The therapy is called eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR) to address the debilitating effects of his anxiety attacks. This revelation offers a glimpse into the royal’s personal struggles and his proactive approach towards mental health care, shedding light on the significance of seeking innovative treatments of traumas.

In a video, Prince Harry can be seen undergoing EMDR therapy, where he taps his shoulders and moves his eyes rapidly. This therapy is relatively new and is used to treat PTSD. Prince Harry shared that he decided to try EMDR to deal with severe anxiety attacks he was experiencing.

Prince Harry mentioned that he was open to trying EMDR because of the therapy and work he had done over the years.

During a therapy session with UK-based psychotherapist Sanja Oakley, Prince Harry demonstrated how EMDR helped him feel better about returning home. He described feeling scared and helpless before, but the therapy helped him cope with those feelings.

Prince Harry’s openness about his experience with EMDR therapy sheds light on alternative treatments for post-traumatic disorder and mental health struggles. It shows that seeking help and trying different therapies can make a difference in managing mental health conditions.

EMDR is a therapy made in 1987 to help with emotional traumas. It’s a structured therapy where you think about a tough memory while moving your eyes back and forth. This helps lessen the strong feelings tied to the memory.

EMDR works on a theory called Adaptive Information Processing (AIP). It says that trauma sticks around because it hasn’t been dealt with properly. So, when something reminds you of the trauma, those memories can come back strongly.

Unlike other therapies that try to lessen your reaction to trauma, EMDR tries to change how your brain stores those tough memories. Sometimes, instead of eye movements, you might listen to alternating tones. Usually, EMDR happens once or twice a week for about six to 12 sessions. But it can vary depending on the person.

Benefits of EMDR therapy

  • EMDR is a structured therapy and usually needs fewer sessions than ongoing therapies.
  • You don’t have to keep going back to the tough memory for a long time.
  • You don’t have to talk a lot about what happened to you.
  • There’s no homework to do.
  • EMDR doesn’t try to change your thoughts and beliefs.

Disadvantages of EMDR therapy

  • While EMDR is known to help with PTSD, it hasn’t been studied as much for other mood or mental health problems.
  • If you’re avoiding talking about a tough event, EMDR might not be the best choice. Other types of talk therapy might work better.
  • EMDR can sometimes make you feel worse at the start of treatment. The person who created EMDR warns that this could be dangerous for people who have gone through really tough things.

The process of EMDR

EMDR is a structured process with eight phases, each aimed at helping you deal with traumatic memories:

  1. History taking: Discuss your past with the therapist to identify which memories to focus on.
  2. Preparation: Learn about EMDR and how the therapist will use bilateral stimulation.
  3. Assessment: Identify your negative and positive beliefs related to the trauma.
  4. Desensitization: Use bilateral stimulation while recalling the memory.
  5. Installation: Focus on positive beliefs while processing the memory.
  6. Body scan: Talk about how you feel emotionally and physically.
  7. Closure: Prepare for what may happen between sessions.
  8. Reevaluation: Assess your progress and decide if more sessions are needed.

As you go through EMDR, you may start feeling less overwhelmed by the trauma. It’s normal for other painful memories to surface, indicating that suppressed memories are being processed.

When grappling with deep emotional traumas, it’s crucial to seek out specialists who can provide the appropriate form of treatment tailored to your needs. Whether it’s EMDR therapy or other therapeutic approaches, finding the right professional can make a significant difference in your healing journey.

Preview photo credit Good Morning America / YouTube

I Looked After My Elderly Neighbor, but Her Son Blamed Me for Not Doing Enough – The Fallout Was Harsh

Debbie, living in a quiet neighborhood, becomes close to her elderly neighbor, Mrs. Jenkins, and begins to care for her. But when Deb’s mother has to undergo surgery, she has no option but to go home and care for her mother… only for her to receive a horrible phone call from Steve, Mrs. Jenkins’ son, accusing her of not doing enough.

Look, I didn’t want revenge on anybody, especially not for just being kind to an elderly neighbor.

I live in a quiet neighborhood, and my next-door neighbor, Mrs. Jenkins, is an 82-year-old widow. She’s frail, lonely, and honestly, sad. It’s like she’s been forgotten by her own family. Her only son, Steve, lives just 20 minutes away but rarely visits.

Whenever I saw her on the porch, she seemed so lost, staring off into the distance. My heart went out to her, so I started helping where I could.

For over a year, I’ve been running small errands. Groceries, appointments, clearing her driveway of leaves in the fall and snow in the winter.

“I don’t know what I’d do without you, Debbie,” she said to me one morning after I dropped off her groceries, including some freshly baked bread for her breakfast.

“I’m here for anything you need, Marlene,” I said.

Honestly, it wasn’t much, but I felt good knowing that I was helping. Especially since her real family was so absent.

“Steve?” she said one day when I asked about him. “That kid means everything to me, but I know I don’t mean as much to my son. It’s okay. You’re here.”

She would always smile like I was her favorite person.

This man, who barely knew his mother’s daily life, had the audacity to accuse me of not doing enough.
But things took a dark turn when I had to leave town for a few weeks. I couldn’t help it, my mother was in the hospital after being diagnosed with fibroids and cysts that needed to be removed.

I had to be there with her. There was no way about it.

“I’m coming, Mom,” I said. “Don’t you worry about a thing.”

“But, Deb,” my mother whined. “I don’t want to disturb your routine. Dad’s here, I’ll be fine with him.”

“Mom, I work from home. I can work from anywhere,” I said sternly. “And anyway, Dad’s idea of taking care of someone is making chicken noodle soup. That’s pretty much it. You’re going for invasive surgery. You need me.”

Before I left, I stocked Mrs. Jenkins’ house with groceries, made sure that she had everything she needed, and asked our neighbor Karen to check in on her from time to time.

“I’ll be back as soon as I can, Marlene,” I said. “Don’t you worry about a thing. And I’ve asked little Josh to come over and check your mail. He knows that if there’s anything in your mailbox, he has to bring it right to you.”

“Thank you, darling,” she said. “You’re too good to me.”

I thought I’d covered all my bases.

Ten days into my stay with my parents, my phone rang while I was cooking dinner. I didn’t recognize the number, but I picked up anyway.

“Debbie?” the voice snapped when I answered. “Are you the neighbor who’s supposed to be taking care of my mom?”

It was Steve. Mrs. Jenkins’ son. The man who barely showed up for his own mother.

For a second, I got nervous, hoping that nothing had happened to her.

“I just got a call from my mother,” he continued, not even stopping for me to speak. “She ran out of milk. And you’re out of town? Why didn’t you make sure she had enough before you left?”

I was absolutely floored. This man, who barely knew his mother’s daily life, had the audacity to accuse me of not doing enough.

Me?

“Steve,” I said, trying to remain calm. “I’m out of town because my mom is in the hospital. This is where I need to be. I stocked your mom up before I left. And I spoke to Karen, our neighbor, to check on her.”

Instead of apologizing or offering to help like any normal person, he shot back.

“Well, that’s just not good enough, Debbie. If you’re going to take care of my mother, then you need to do it right! I can’t be running around getting her things whenever you drop the ball.”

I almost screamed. The audacity of this man was astounding.

How could he accuse me of dropping the ball when I’d been doing everything for her? Especially while he sat back and did nothing!

I took a deep breath.

“Steve, she’s your mother. You can’t expect me to do everything for her while you’re right there, and do nothing! Maybe you should help her out for once.”

His response was just sad.

“You’re pathetic,” he said. “You don’t even do that much for her.”

Before I could retaliate, I just cut the call. I didn’t want to say anything worse, and I also didn’t want to risk it getting back to Marlene and upsetting her.

Later, as I sat with my mom in her hospital room, I couldn’t stop replaying that conversation. By the time I got home, I knew exactly what I needed to do.

“Go home, honey,” my mother said when I told her about Steve’s phone call. “I’m doing just fine, and my progress is great. The doctor is really happy with me. I told you, Dad and I will be fine!”

I really didn’t want to leave, but I missed my own home. And I missed working from my own space, too. So, I left a few days later.

When I got back, the first thing I did was check on Mrs. Jenkins. Thankfully, she was fine. It turns out that Karen had taken care of the milk situation, and Mrs. Jenkins had no idea about the chaos Steve had stirred up.

“What? Really? He said that?” she exclaimed, shocked.

Steve had to step up. He was not happy about it. Not at all.

As glad as I was that Steve hadn’t fed her any stories about me, I wasn’t going to allow him to get away with this.

The next day, I gently told Mrs. Jenkins that I wouldn’t be able to help her as much anymore.

“I have other commitments, Marlene,” I said sadly. “I have to check on my mother more often, too. She’s going to need me for the next few weeks.”

She looked disappointed, but she reassured me that she understood.

A few weeks went by, and Steve had no choice but to step up. Naturally, he wasn’t happy about it. Sometimes, as I worked from my living room, I could see him showing up to his mother’s house. He always looked irritated, like running an errand for his mother was the biggest burden anyone could have placed on him.

When I did visit Mrs. Jenkins next, she smiled and told me that she was relying on Steve more.

“I call him for everything,” she said. “Milk, teabags, and even help with the gutters.”

One afternoon, Mrs. Jenkins asked me to help her sort through some old papers. That’s when we stumbled upon her will.

Naturally, Steve was listed as the sole beneficiary.

“It’s a shame that Steve cannot spend more time with you,” I said casually. “You know, with work and whatnot.”

“I know, dear,” Mrs. Jenkins sighed. “But he’s been like that. Sometimes I think he only sticks around for what I’ll leave him.”

That was all the confirmation I needed.

“You know, Marlene,” I said. “You don’t have to leave everything to Steve. It might be nice to donate some to charity or leave something for the people who have always been there for you. That’s a sweet gesture. Think about it.”

“You’re right, Debbie,” she said. “I’ll think about it.”

A week later, Mrs. Jenkins updated her will. Steve still got his share, but she also included several charities to get vast portions of her estate. She left a little something for me, too, though I didn’t ask for it.

It wasn’t about the money. It was about showing Steve that neglect and greed have consequences.

When Steve found out, he stormed to my house, knocking furiously on my door.

“You convinced my mother to give away my inheritance? You manipulative little…”

I cut him off before he could finish his sentence.

“I didn’t convince her of anything. Maybe if you spent more time with her, you’d know what she really wanted.”

Steve spluttered, his face turning red. He shouted a few more insults and stormed off, but I could see it in his eyes.

He knew that he had lost.

Now, the lovely Mrs. Jenkins is happier than ever, and I’m taking her to the ballet later this week. Steve is sulking, likely regretting all the time he wasted.

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And as for me? I’m happy knowing that Mrs. Jenkins isn’t being taken advantage of by Steve.

Sometimes, the best revenge is just letting someone realize their own failure.

What would you have done?

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