I Chose Not to Include My Daughter-in-Law on a Family Vacation, and I Believe My Decision Was Justified

But every trip was a reminder of how connected we were and how much we valued this time together. It was a break from our everyday lives, a chance to let loose and just be, at least for some time.

“Mom, do you remember that time at the beach house when Kayla fell off the dock?” Evelyn would laugh, nudging her sister.

“Don’t remind me!” Kayla groaned, but she couldn’t help smiling. “I still can’t believe you all left me in the water like that.”

“We didn’t leave you, sweetheart. We were laughing too hard to pull you out,” I would tease, shaking my head.

These moments were precious, and I held onto them fiercely. But things started to change when Liam, my only son, got married to Beth.

Beth was sweet when they first met. Quiet, reserved, but kind-hearted. I was genuinely happy for them, and when they got married, I welcomed her into our family with open arms. Naturally, I invited her to join us on our girls’ trips. I wanted her to feel included, to be a part of our little tradition. It felt right at the time.

At first, Beth fit in well enough. She was always polite, maybe a little shy, but I thought she’d warm up eventually. She wasn’t as chatty as my girls, but she seemed to enjoy the trips. We all tried to make her feel comfortable.

“So, Beth,” Kayla asked one afternoon as we sat in a café on one of our trips. “What was it like growing up in Maine? I’ve always wanted to visit.”

Beth smiled softly, twirling the straw in her iced coffee. “It was nice. Quiet. Not much to do in my town, but the summers were beautiful.”

The conversation felt a bit forced, but we all chalked it up to Beth needing time to adjust. She’d become part of our family, and I wanted her to feel like she belonged.

But after Beth gave birth to her son, Lucas, things changed. She gained a lot of weight during pregnancy, which isn’t unusual. However, eight years later, she still hadn’t lost the baby weight.

I noticed how much it was affecting her, not just physically but in the way she moved and interacted with us. It was becoming harder to include her in our trips.

One day, we were out shopping. It was supposed to be a fun, lighthearted afternoon, just like old times. We’d hit the mall, grabbed lunch, and made our way through the stores, chatting and laughing. But Beth kept falling behind.

I glanced back and saw her sitting on a bench near the entrance of a department store. She looked exhausted, wiping the sweat from her brow. “You guys go ahead,” she said, breathing heavily. “I’ll catch up.”

Evelyn raised an eyebrow at me, trying to hide her frustration. “Mom, do we need to wait again?”

I sighed. “Let’s just give her a few minutes.”

But those few minutes turned into long stretches of waiting. We’d walk ahead, browse through the racks, and eventually circle back to find Beth still sitting there. It was becoming a pattern — and not just on that day. Every trip we went on, we had to slow down, stop more often, and accommodate her.

By the time we left the mall that day, the mood had shifted. What was supposed to be a carefree afternoon felt strained, and my girls were clearly frustrated.

“Mom, I hate to say it, but these trips aren’t the same anymore,” Kayla said as we loaded the shopping bags into the car.

“I know,” I replied, running a hand through my hair. “I just… I don’t want to leave her out.”

Evelyn nodded, her face softening. “We get it. But we can’t keep doing this. It’s not fair to us either.”

I couldn’t argue with that. I knew they were right. The truth was, Beth’s presence had begun to change the dynamic of our trips, and not for the better.

We were holding back, compromising our enjoyment to accommodate her. And it wasn’t just about walking slower or sitting more. It felt like the whole energy of our outings was different.

The tipping point came when we started planning our annual trip to the pumpkin patch and apple orchard. It’s a tradition we’ve had for years — my favorite time of the year.

The fall colors, the smell of apples in the air, the laughter as we wandered through the orchard picking fruit. It was something we all looked forward to.

As we sat around the kitchen table, Evelyn looked up from her phone. “So, are we inviting Beth this year?”

I hesitated. We all knew what that would mean. Long breaks, slow walks, and probably missing out on some of the things we enjoyed most about the trip.

“I don’t think it’s a good idea,” I finally said, my voice low. “It’s a lot of walking, and… well, you know.”

Kayla sighed with relief. “I’m glad you said it, Mom. It’s been hard with her.”

“We haven’t had a proper girls’ day in so long,” Lauren added, looking at her sisters. “I miss the way things used to be.”

The truth was staring me in the face, and there was no avoiding it.
That’s when I made the decision not to invite Beth. It wasn’t easy, but I told myself it was for the best. My daughters deserved a day to relax and enjoy themselves without constantly having to adjust to Beth’s limitations.

The day of the trip came, and it was perfect. The weather was crisp, the leaves were golden and red, and we spent the entire day walking through the orchard, picking apples, and laughing.

We didn’t have to stop or slow down. It was like the old days, just me and my girls. I even posted a few pictures on Facebook, not thinking much of it.

But later that night, my phone rang. It was Beth.

I took a deep breath before answering. “Hi, Beth.”

“Lilian, I saw the pictures on Facebook,” she said, her voice tense. “Why wasn’t I invited?”

I felt my stomach drop. I knew this conversation was coming, but I wasn’t prepared. “Oh, it was just a small trip,” I stammered. “Nothing big.”

“But I’m family,” Beth said, her voice rising. “Why didn’t you invite me?”

There it was. The question I had been dreading. I could’ve lied, made up some excuse, but what would be the point? The truth was staring me in the face, and there was no avoiding it.

“Beth,” I said softly, trying to choose my words carefully. “It’s not that we don’t want you there. It’s just… well, the walking. You’ve needed a lot of breaks, and it’s made it hard for us to enjoy the trips the way we used to.”

Silence hung in the air for what felt like an eternity.

“So, you didn’t invite me because of my weight?” she asked, her voice barely above a whisper.

I swallowed hard. “Yes,” I admitted, guilt washing over me. “It’s been difficult. We’ve had to change the way we do things, and… I didn’t want to say anything, but it’s affected our trips.”

Beth was quiet for a moment, and I could feel the hurt radiating through the phone. “I thought I was part of this family,” she finally said, her voice trembling. “I thought you cared about me.”

“I do care about you, Beth—”

“No, you don’t,” she interrupted. “If you did, you wouldn’t have excluded me like this. You wouldn’t make me feel like an outsider.”

And with that, she hung up. I sat there, staring at the phone, my heart heavy with regret.

Later that night, Liam texted me. “Mom, Beth’s really hurt. You need to apologize.”

I read the text over and over, feeling torn. Should I apologize? Was I wrong to protect this time with my daughters? I wasn’t sure anymore.

The next morning, I talked to the girls. “Do you think I was too harsh?” I asked as we sat around the kitchen table.

“No, Mom,” Evelyn said, shaking her head. “We love Beth, but it’s not fair to us either. Our trips haven’t been the same.”

Kayla nodded. “We just want to enjoy ourselves like we used to. You did the right thing.”

Their reassurance helped, but I couldn’t shake the guilt. I didn’t want to hurt Beth, but I couldn’t ignore the strain her presence had put on our trips.

I’d reached my limit. Maybe I could’ve handled it better, maybe I should’ve been kinder, but the truth was out now.

I still don’t know if I made the right decision. All I wanted was to protect the bond I had with my daughters. But now I wonder if that decision has cost me something far greater.

Do you think I handled it correctly? What would you have done in my place?

My mom prohibited me from seeing my dad, but his phone call changed everything

My mother did everything in her power to prevent me from seeing my father after they divorced. But once my dad tricked me on the phone, and everything changed.

“I don’t want to see you ever again!” my mom yelled as my father got into the car and left our home forever. That was my earliest memory. Dad left when I was two years old after a huge fight with my mother.

They got divorced, and I didn’t see him for many years. As I got older, I realized that my mother was preventing me from seeing my father. “I want to visit Dad. Please!” I begged when I was ten years old.

“No! You can’t go see him. He’s busy with his new family and doesn’t want to see you,” she replied.

“I know that’s not true! You’re lying to me! I talk to him on the phone, and he wants to see me!” I cried, pleading with her to see my father.

“Don’t talk back to me, Alexandra! Your father left us and doesn’t deserve to have a relationship with you now,” Mom said. I thought that was unfair, but I was still just a child.

My dad and I kept in constant contact over the phone, but I really wanted to spend time with him, and I knew he wanted the same. However, Mom was an expert at getting her way.

As a teenager, I decided to go on my own to see him, and she called the cops on me. They picked me up before I could reach his house and drove me back home.

“The next time you try to disobey me, I will say that your father kidnapped you, and he will go to jail where he belongs!” she screamed at me when the cops left.

Back then, I thought she was doing the right thing for me, but as I grew up, I realized that it was pure selfishness on her part. I didn’t want to hang out with her or do anything. I also started rebelling at school. She drove a huge wedge between us, and I didn’t care anymore.

“Alexandra, do you want to go shopping with me?” she asked me one day. I was 17 years old and had grown to almost hate her.

“Nope,” I answered.

“How about the movies?”

“Nope.”

“Why don’t you want to do anything with me?” she whined.

“Really? You’re asking me that question? You know exactly why I treat you this way,” I said in a bored tone.

“I have done nothing to you! All the sacrifices I have made for you, and you’re so ungrateful!” Mom yelled once more.

“Yeah, ok. Close the door, please,” I added.

By then, I was immune to her tantrums and how she victimized herself to get away with things. I moved out as soon as I turned 18 and never looked back.

But seeing my dad wasn’t any easier. I had to work two jobs and go to school. He was also busy with work, and his second wife had just delivered twins by then. Neither of us had time, so we put it off.

I met with him on a Saturday afternoon at his house and met his wife. They showed me the twins, and we talked for a while. But it felt so awkward that I didn’t want to do it again. Maybe my mother had ruined any chance I had at a relationship with him.

We talked on the phone for a long time once a week. I asked about the twins and told him about my life. It wasn’t ideal, but it worked for us. Years went by this way. I didn’t hear of my mother until I was 29 years old.

“Hey, Alexandra,” she spoke on the phone tentatively.

“Oh, hey, Mom,” I answered, confused with her call.

“We haven’t talked in a long time. How are you?” she asked.

“I’m fine. How about you?” I replied. We chitchatted awkwardly for a few minutes, and then she got to the point.

“Listen, honey. I was hoping that we could work on mending our relationship. How does that sound?” Mom wondered.

“I don’t know. Are you going to apologize for everything?” I retorted.

“I…I still don’t think I did anything wrong. I was trying to protect you from being hurt like I was when you were little. But I understand that you felt differently,” she explained.

“So, you’re not apologizing?” I continued, tired of this conversation. She was never going to acknowledge her wrongs, and I had no time for that.

“Alexandra! I’m your mother. You haven’t talked to me in years! You’re so selfish!” she wailed, raising her voice.

“Ok, goodbye,” I said and hung up the phone. She tried calling me back, but I ignored her. I would not let her back into my life until she apologized.

Another year went by, and I received a strange call from my dad. He never called during working hours. “Alexandra! This is an emergency! Can you come to see me?” Dad said urgently through the phone.

“What? Dad? What’s going on?” I asked, worried.

“I sent you an address. Come quickly! This is a matter of life or death!” he told me and hung up.

I went to my boss, took a day off work, and ran to my car. But the address Dad gave me took me right to an amusement park close to his house.

“Hey, honey!” he smiled when I met him at the front gate.

“Dad! Why are we here? What’s the emergency?” I asked, confused.

“The emergency is that you and I never got to do all the fun things father and daughters do over the years. We have put off building a real relationship, and I don’t want to waste any more time. Let’s go have fun!” Dad explained.

“Can you go on the rides? I know you have had some health problems lately,” I said hesitantly.

“I’m fit as a fiddle. Come on!” he urged.

We spent the entire day at the park and talked about everything. I felt like a child for the first time in my life, and it was wonderful.

I also told him about my problems with Mom and how hard it was when she didn’t let me see him. “Your mother is complicated and full of pride. But she’s not evil. We didn’t work out, and she couldn’t take it,” he started.

“Yeah, I wished I could’ve lived with you,” I told him.

“Well, I was pretty lost for many years trying to figure things out. We might have hated each other. But here we are, and I think you should patch things up with her. Life is too short to hold grudges,” he said.

After that marvelous day at the park, we went to dinner. When I got home, I called Mom and told her everything I felt regarding my dad. How she hurt me back then by not letting me spend time with him and how fun our day had been. She cried and apologized to me for the first time. I felt like she understood, and we started talking more often.

Meanwhile, I grew closer to my dad and loved babysitting my twin half-siblings. We even took them to the amusement park for a fun day too.

I finally had the childhood I always wanted.

What can we learn from this story?

Divorce happens between couples, not with children. Alexandra’s mother didn’t understand that her father divorced her but wanted a relationship with their daughter.
Life is too short for grudges. Alexandra’s father is right. Sometimes, it’s better to forgive for your own sake. Let go of things that make you angry, and your mental health will improve.

Share this story with your friends. It might brighten their day and inspire them.

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